Chris

WORK
My Official Blog
COMMENTS
Jul 18, 2008 2:18 PM
Happy Friday Chris,
It's Donato's foster daughter...he adopted her when she was 13 and now she's a bright 20 year old interning with Tarina. Really wonderful.

Hope you and the lovely lady are well! x
Jul 04, 2008 10:07 AM
Thanks for the informative and entertaining posts
And well... oh yeah.. pictures too!

And for reviving the word "wanker".
desmond
Jun 26, 2008 7:01 AM
some of your photos really inspires me, & i appreciate what you do.

hi from the south-east asia by the way. =)
Jun 26, 2008 6:42 AM
thanks for the friendship. hug jack
Jun 20, 2008 5:01 PM
Hey thannks! Im happy im done with hs. And youre right i wrote that like two days ago and things are picking up already.
Jun 19, 2008 4:24 PM
Hey Chris,

Was fun seeing you man.

Let me know what's up. Trying to get my friend Micha from Poland (eelmikashigaru on dA) to fly out in October, perhaps you'll be able to make it up around then?

Let me know man!
Jun 18, 2008 9:48 AM
hey how are you?

! just wanna let you know that i stop by =]

hit me up =]
Jun 17, 2008 2:33 AM
sooo many photographers..

i love it =]

just wanna let you know i stop by =]

nice page!
Jun 16, 2008 11:28 PM
Hi Chris,
thank you for infecting me with the blog bug...
I find your pages very amusing...
Regards,
Stevan
Jun 12, 2008 4:52 PM
Just finished reading your article on "Why we photograph" great stuff!
Jun 06, 2008 10:50 PM
I'm still dreaming of roasting a pig!
Jun 04, 2008 4:30 PM
mmm, i like this. a lot.
yeah, already saw the s.j.p. site, i was shocked, but its just so funny...makes you feel a bit bad though. wonder if she's seen it?
anyway, was just stopping by,
xx
May 27, 2008 6:57 PM
Dude! You never seize to amaze me! There's a light speed response time for you :) I love the tinsel town DOF in your latest post. RESPECT, man!
May 26, 2008 2:00 PM
Chris, I'm always psyched when you can pop by my page and check out another attempt of mine at blogging. Without getting too corny -- I totally appreciate it when you do! Thanks, bro!
May 23, 2008 4:12 AM
Nice page
:-)
May 23, 2008 3:14 AM
Likewise thanks a lot for the comment man! Your work has inspired me very much. Always dig seein' pics of the dog, too!
May 22, 2008 7:33 PM
Thanks for the blog comment :) :)
May 18, 2008 8:35 PM
nice two words you've added to your page title here
May 15, 2008 7:48 PM
yo, dude, you already said that in one of my blog posts!

cheers anyway! its just a random digi snapshot and some PS! wanted to make it look like really shallow depth of field but it came out looking all strange :D

haha. :D

btw cant wait to get that nikon d3 in my hands, only 3 and half weeks to go yamm.
they sayd i would be going to the summer villa of the finnish prime minister for a portrait for some article :O lol hope i can pull it off. im sure i can.
May 14, 2008 5:34 PM
Thanks for the blog comment. =]

From what I've hurd so far, I agree.
Comment:
RSS Feed
May 15, 2008 2:10 PM  (go back to main view)
when wankers blog about their jealousy...
this is a screencap from firefox ...




i know ... it's mean ...
what-the-fuck-ever. hope our cavalier-friends aren't reading this post.

so ... yesterday ... i was trolling for "items." that trolling usually includes clicking both of the websites i have in the donkeys bookmark tab. anyway ... yesterday i read:

"Nikon 70-200mm f/2.8 VR on D3:
I'm still working on this, however as I thought, my mailbag is overflowing with testimonials from full-time professionals who have nothing but praise for the 70-200VR, on the D3 and every other camera. In fact, not only do pros shoot it in the pouring rain, they shoot it in dim concerts as well as for news and sports. Some even have had other photographers and newspapers asking what lens they used to get such great shots!

Real pros don't have websites. People with too much time on their hands have websites since they're not out shooting. This is why I caution everyone not to believe anything they read on the Internet unless they know the author personally."who the fuck is wank kidding?

is he so fucking jealous that he's NEVER BEEN GOOD ENOUGH to be a real pro -- those outside of portrait studios in suburban malls?

when he said this ... i checked the website of one of the best wedding shooters in the united kingdom, jeff ascough. like crazy good. jeff's also got a blog. hmm ... jeff is pro and has time to do a bit of blogging? seems pros and anyone with an educated real-world opinion threatens ken-wannabe-rockwell. hmm...

the list could go on and on and on of the pros i personally know with some type of web presence. and pro ... defined ... as someone who is working as a photographer in a non-glam-shot-in-the-mall-kinda-thing.

i'll just stick with jeff, though. if you were to believe wank, you may think that a pro should just make photos for a living and leave any opinion about gear or photography itself to ... wanna-be-pros like ken rockwell. personally, i'd rather hear someone like jeff's opinions about photography ... no a blow-hard wank like rockwell.

rockwell can't even make a decent photo. probably never has been able to.

it's the same with that onlinephotographer.com guy. a mutual friend said i shouldn't pick on him. thing is ... i care more about people who look to someone they don't know for an honest opinion. if you cannot make a photo, DO NOT REVIEW CAMERA GEAR OR TELL OTHERS HOW TO MAKE PHOTOS.

YOU ARE A FUCKING FRAUD.

if you cannot make a photo, don't post "how-to's." it's too bad wank can't be kicked off the internet.

the internet is such a cool thing ... but ... it's made "instant experts" out of so many people. which, honestly, sucks for people who just want "an honest opinion."

heroin really is so passé. sorry ... listening to dandy warhols.

anyway ... i think it's absurd for someone like rockwell to think that only he -- as a non-working photographer with barely enough talent to illustrate his feeble opinions -- the right express his opinions.

rockwell, get some talent ... then perhaps you won't be laughable. ;)

cheers from the soon-to-be-boiling-l.a.!

Related Posts:
street photography contest ...(2 days ago - 82 Comments)
what a long week!(5 days ago - 48 Comments)
discarded winning memories...(8 days ago - 78 Comments)
when donkeys exhibit...(11 days ago - 60 Comments)
stripper-free.(14 days ago - 72 Comments)
Blog Comments (43):
Posted by Mark Taylo... on May 18, 2008 4:02 PM
From the wedding photo section, I laughed my ass off -
"I'm not a wedding photographer, but my friends won't believe me. They keep twisting my arm and making me shoot these."

I wish they would twist his arm off, preferably the one he holds his cameras with... hell why not both arms.
Thanks for the laughs and the linkk to Jeff, he has some brilliant stuff.
Cheers
Posted by Michael on May 16, 2008 8:24 AM
wtf?!? how, in this day in age, can a photographer NOT take advantage ofsuch a perfect(well, not PERFECT) medium for showing, chatting, sharing andselling as the internet is? pro or otherwise? i mean, if this guy isdumpin on people with blogs or websites and saying they're not "pros" thanwhat the fuck is he? that's right, you called it chris -- "A FUCKING FRAUD" great call out man, i hate posers, they're more than a waste of time, air orspace, theyre a waste of EVERYTHING, later bro and enjoy the sun you luckybastard;)
Posted by b0 on May 16, 2008 3:59 AM
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 11:35 PM
@obsidian: i doubt a knife if a knife is his style. a nikon isn't either because to have a nikon as your style you'd have to actually be able to shoot it. ;)

i'll see if there's space on the dA corporate jet.

*emails angelo*
Posted by equivoque on May 15, 2008 8:44 PM
umm... wouldn't a website be the most current marketing and promotion tool available? ;-)
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 9:24 PM
yes, and i think he misspoke, actually...

i was thinking he meant "pros that blog."

he's just a dumbass.
Posted by Tinz on May 15, 2008 6:45 PM
ahaha since pros don't have websites, guess that's his admission that he's not one.
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 7:55 PM
you're smart! so true.
Posted by Tinz on May 15, 2008 7:07 PM
so out of curiosity and possibly a bit of boredom, I read his about page:
"While occasionally inspired by actual products or experiences, if you aren't a personal friend or lack a sense of humor or lack a decent BS detector, you're best off treating this site as a work of fiction. If you can't take a joke, please consider this entire site a joke, and any resemblance to any actual people, places, products or anything as purely coincidental."
um, what?
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 7:56 PM
TOTAL WORK OF FICTION.

perhaps the joke's on anyone visiting: it's total bullshit and he knows it.
Posted by NAT UH LEE on May 15, 2008 6:25 PM
What a fucking retard.

Photographers are people too, people that like photography, therefore they would blog about photography...most likely their own.

That's like saying that REAL actors don't blog or have websites or that REAL musicians don't have blogs or websites.

That guy is rediculous.
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 7:57 PM
that gives retards a bad name, love.

therefore i believe you're right.

basically, this guy is grasping at straws and they continually slip through his fingers.

there's no market for landscape, his only genre which he does even marginally well. he knows that. i doubt there's a photo editor on the planet who would hire this guy. ;)

totally ridiculous, love. totally.
Posted by mahomo on May 15, 2008 6:20 PM
thanks for the rockwell weddings link, always makes me laugh seeing shots that look like my mum took them in '84 with an automatic compact on kodak gold ;) jeff ascough is fucking brilliant, thanks for that link :D
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 7:59 PM
um ... i think those were from the nineties so basically it shows the crowd he hangs with are not exactly "fashion forward."

backward, in fact. you'd think this guy lives in bratislava. ;)

glad you liked jeff's work. everyone should be as lucky as to have this guy shoot their wedding for sure!
Posted by Obsidian-F... on May 15, 2008 6:04 PM
haha, didnt he just out himself as a fraud there? I mean, those who know wank would know better than to read his tripe..

I use the 70-200VR, its awesome.. altho, I didnt need anyone online or off to tell me that.. and consequently, other than the passing "i love this lens" im not going to tell anyone else about it either.

Thanks for WB updates here Chris, i dont go looking for them myself, im glad to get a rundown of the funniest ;)

Cheers mate! Its actually cloudy/not raining today!!
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 6:15 PM
i doubt he'll ever figure out what a fraud he really is. then again, he could post what he thinks is amazing, perhaps. he could even post new work instead of boring ass lawn furniture in san diego county. ;)

that is an awesome lens for sure. being a canon shooter, though, my 70-200/2.8L works very well for me.

i would take your opinion way-way-way before i took his, just so you know.

no worries on the rundown. he's on my radar. ;)

cloudy-hot-raining? wow. seriously, i would love to visit vancouver again!

love it up there!
Posted by Obsidian-F... on May 15, 2008 9:14 PM
One day the prodigal wank will show up at your door either with a knife ( a nikon knife) or be begging you to teach him the way

Come up with angelo when i put a devmeet together this august.. ;)

Posted by seanazul on May 15, 2008 5:38 PM
Wedding photographs like Rockwell's are the reason I became a wedding photographer.

And you're right - I barely have time to update my blog with the photos I'm paid to take, much less setting up tripods with 3 cameras and taking photos of a fence post at 20 different f-stops to see which one is sharper and has less noise.

I wonder what these idiots would do if they ever had to printTMAX 1600 on Ilford paper - The grain on that stuff is as big as Ryan Rockwells head.
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 6:17 PM
the world should thank you for trying and saving their eyes from "visual tripe" that rockwell and his wish-i-were-professional ilk produce.

yeah, you're busy! i'm happy for you.

i'm sure rockwell knows ALL about printing. like everything. like i'm sure he's sitting on some compendium. ;)

coffee soon?
Posted by CMphotogra... on May 15, 2008 5:17 PM
i had a look at jeff's homepage a few days ago...his work is amazing. never thought wedding photography could be that cool :)
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 5:34 PM
truth-be-told ... i love doing available light wedding work.

and, yes, jeff makes wedding work look amazing. not everyone can do what jeff does, though.

he's a nice guy, too!
Posted by gONZOm on May 15, 2008 4:56 PM
wedding photography can be so beautiful when done properly...
"however as I thought, my mailbag is overflowing with testimonials from full-time professionals who have nothing but praise for the 70-200VR, on the D3 and every other camera."
thats hilarious!!!
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 5:01 PM
wedding photography when done right ... not like this...
http://www.kenrockwell.com/weddings/index.htm
or
this
http://www.kenrockwell.com/weddings/Joy/index.htm

terrible.

so hilarious when you take into account he has zero talent.
Posted by gONZOm on May 15, 2008 8:51 PM
i hope hes not in real life as hes on the web...that would be devastating for the poor poor poor poor poor woman that somehow accepted to be her wife, and also accepted to appear in this freaky picture http://www.kenrockwell.com/engagement/christmas.ht m
it seems that he only knows how to do closeups in the weddings!! =P
and all of those wedding pictures look like a cheap porn movie...he really doesnt know how to use available light...
Posted by Rob Bostic... on May 15, 2008 4:36 PM
Heya' Chris, I'm a newly minted uber-user-deviant-art-refugee.

i hope your happy. :)


Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 5:02 PM
fyi ... i like the initial colour scheme and layout of your page!
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 5:01 PM
yo!!!!! very happy you found the community here. art first; community second. ;)

very happy! :)

are you?
Posted by Kamil Wyso... on May 15, 2008 4:28 PM
What a moron, this Ken is.
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 4:34 PM
moron and someone feeding his ever-quenching-for-validation-ego.
Posted by Darren Aba... on May 15, 2008 3:45 PM
I don't want to disappoint Ken, so I guess I'd better delete all my online shit. I guess just because 99.9% of my income comes from photography, I can't consider myself a pro because I happen to have 30 minutes a day to keep up with the intarwebz.

Damn, I was just getting to like this internet thing, too.
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 4:05 PM
yeah, i mean far be it from someone like you (e.g., someone who makes 100% of their income from shooting freelance) to say what's good and what isn't.

you aren't allowed to have that 30 mins for the web, mate. don't you know that? that's reserved for people, like thorsten indicated, who "help people" with non-real world advice and BEG FOR DONATIONS.

i was, too. now i'm sad, brother.
Posted by Richard Po... on May 15, 2008 2:56 PM
Amen to that! This kind of guys are just sad. Maybe he wants to start his own cult.
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 4:06 PM
he probably has his own little cult. ;)

cult of the gullible. wait ... all cult members are gullible.
Posted by Thorsten O... on May 15, 2008 2:48 PM
A guy who spend that much time and that many words telingyou how much he just want to help you and could you please send him a donation via paypal so he can continue his good work - he he, that's a fraud, no doubt.

You may sing that last line, here you go: "that's a fraud, no doubt"

"that's a fraud, no doubt"

"that's a fraud, no doubt"

"that's a fraud, no doubt"



Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 4:04 PM
in this context i agree with the blinking test, mate! ;)

"all i want to do is help people: please send me a donation."

at least theonlinephotographer.com guy has ads and doesn't beg for money.
Posted by Dmitry on May 15, 2008 2:46 PM
Thats an awsome point. Once again it reminds me of that quote "Those who know don't talk.Those who talk don't know." Its like me giving advice to a doctor about this and that ... there need to be a filter.. you should contact google for that maybe they can come up with something LOL
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 2:47 PM
that filter idea is a good one, mate.

happy you still enjoy the rants!

cheers!
Posted by David Dayb... on May 15, 2008 2:35 PM
OMG

amazing

he can truly suck it

I mean Ive actually met Jeff Ascough
at a wedding of course

but he was very humble

But he told me to look up his blog, i never did though...
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 2:46 PM
thanks for the comment, david. actually, i just got an email from jeff! such a cool guy.

have you looked it up now?

cheers, mate!
Posted by Eddie on May 15, 2008 2:28 PM
youre full of sass today...love it!
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 2:33 PM
well ... ya' know.

thanks!
Posted by saintbob on May 15, 2008 2:27 PM
I always get a real kick out of your blogs, so much grouchy humour, cool pics and an honesty that shines through the drabbery and mediocrity. Damn! You made me invent a word there, damn you all to drabbery hell!
Posted by Chris on May 15, 2008 2:34 PM
drabbery! great word!

see ... all i want to do is inspire! good photos. new words. world peace. whatever. ;)

thanks, mate!
RSS Feed
Add a comment